6. A Nashville man, a

I have been religiously smoking the herb for the past eleven years. In fact, I'm religiously smoking some delicious gold right now and the damn joint keeps going out.
    Henceforth, let it be known that the word herb will be used for marijuana. Let me start off by telling you that I have devoted my life to this herb. It is my religion, my God. My whole world revolves around it. This may sound sad to you but it's not. I have lots of fun all the time. I have to admit that it's limiting at times, but not so much as to inhibit my peaceful coexistence with this planet Earth.
    I am a different human being. Most working-class people start their day with a cup of coffee in the morning. I start mine with a joint. No matter what (even when I'm sick), I start the day with a joint. No matter what. If my lunch break at noon is long enough I will smoke herb. Usually I will wait till I get home. If I'm not working, well, that's another story. I will smoke herb about every three hours. My usual consumption is one fat joint (about two grams) of uncleaned flowers. I will chain smoke until it is gone. I don't believe in saving herb. I believe it should be consumed as fresh as possible (after curing) in order to partake of the full experience. Consuming stale herb is absolutely sinful to me. Stale herb has lost 50 percent of its energy or more.
    I use herb virtually as a cure-all remedy. Ever since childhood I have been thin, with a poor appetite to boot. Now I eat with enthusiasm. I must smoke a joint before each meal or I will have no appetite at all. Eating stoned is more exciting than eating straight. Flavors seem to jump right out of the food. Even smells are more intense.
    When I come home from work I must smoke a joint. Work really winds me up. If I have no herb I will lose my mind. I become very sad and upset. I cannot relax without it. I become snappish and irritable. A real monster This happens very rarely for I am a Holy Man amongst my peers. A Holy Man's job is to always have herb. I will go to great lengths sometimes to obtain it.
    I must smoke a joint before sleep or I will get none. I will often have an upset stomach and sometimes if I smoke a joint it will settle it. Herb relieves boredom. Herb will relieve certain types of mild pain such as aching bone joints when you have the flu. Me and my old lady will smoke at the movies. Even at the Kiddy Matinee when we saw Star Wars.
    When I write letters stoned I'm less serious and tend to write about positive things instead of negative ones. I would not think of attending a live concert without a full stash of herb. Just unthinkable. When you wake up in the morning with an alcoholic hangover, try smoking a joint. Notice the difference. I also use it to make tea and to flavor foods.
    I use it because it is wholly gratifying. I like to suck a joint and fill my lungs with smoke and exhale billowy clouds. I have used herb to barter for other drugs, food, money and have used it for a tip for services rendered. Sometimes herb will take a headache away. Sometimes it will cause one. If I really get stoned on herb (which is very hard for me since I smoke it all the time) it will keep me awake when I want to sleep, acting like a stimulant. I have to smoke Hawaiian or Thai herb to do this.
    Speaking of Hawaiian, that's where I would like to live eventually. Of all the herb that I have smoked I think it's the most perfect in every way. It is the most unique species of herb that I have ever encountered. I had an excellent connection for Hawaiian herb at one point, but alas, all things must pass.
    I find that when I'm stoned I can laugh easily at silly things. Being stoned makes me more childlike. Maybe that's one aspect of herb that I like when I'm paranoid about being an adult. Adults are notorious for being too serious about everything. I find that when I'm serious I tend to worry about things too much. One must be able to laugh at anything at one time or another. You might call it a nothing is sacred attitude. It helps keep me smiling.
    The one major drawback that I have observed in myself over the years is that I seem to be very absent-minded with a pronounced loss of short-term memory. Also a less responsive long-term memory. Sometimes if I'm hanging out in the living room and decide that I'm hungry, I'll go to the kitchen and forget what I came in for. Oh well, everything has its negative points.
    God is herb. Herb is God. When you smoke herb, you and God become one. Everything becomes equal. Smoking is prayer. The more you smoke the more you are God and you control everything. Smoking is the holiest act. A true holy person takes the herbal sacrament as often as he can. It is surely a way to happiness.